同等學(xué)力英語(yǔ)作文批改：第16期

來(lái)源：育路教育網(wǎng) 時(shí)間：2011-07-01 10:55:44

　　同等學(xué)力英語(yǔ)作文原文：

　　I set myself against feeding pets

　　Recent years, with people living standard improvement, many bring up pets more and more. Pet market gets very hot. Many kind of small animal are lovely very much. However, yet someone don’t like these animal. There are several main opinions about feeding pets. One hand, supporters think that pets can bring many pleasant for people; another hand, opposed people think that feeding pets can cause many trouble, even unpredicted hurt. As a young man, I support the later.

　　There are some reasons for supporting my opinions. First, feeding pets need taking many time, but now I haven’t, because I am very busy every day. Second, for feeding pets there are some unpleasant smell in our house, and animal’s hair scatter all around, I don’t tolerant it. Third, some pets usually take many harmful bacteria, they can affect children and elder’s health.

　　With these disadvantage, t set myself against feeding pets.

　　名師點(diǎn)評(píng)：10分。

　　同學(xué)你好，你的結(jié)構(gòu)安排比較合理，只是在第二段論證自己觀點(diǎn)時(shí)要找有說(shuō)服力的論據(jù)，不要拿自己說(shuō)事，因?yàn)槟銈€(gè)人只是個(gè)特例。

　　比如：你說(shuō)養(yǎng)寵物需要花很多時(shí)間，你完全可以說(shuō)幫寵物洗澡，會(huì)讓人分心等等。

　　注意一些表達(dá)方式的正確運(yùn)用和語(yǔ)法問(wèn)題。

　　加油！